Across the street from where I stand,
A girl is dressing up for date,
Holding hair up with her hand,
Hoping he's a little late.
Smiling to her own reflection,
knowing she looks beautiful,
Hoping for some new affection,
Oh isn't life just wonderful.
I'm sitting here just looking out,
Washing off my mothers tears,
Wishing I could be that girl,
Without the trauma and the fears.
But I could never quite explain,
And ask for him to comprehend,
Why I was never really sane,
And why the wounds will never mend.
Why I'm sitting here alone tonight,
Just living through a strangers bliss,
Through the window in the light,
Dreaming of the things I miss.
I wish I had a normal life,
And not a flashing warning sign,
To tell the world I'm not alright,
So I could live this life of mine.
But through the lessons of my past,
I've grown so fragile and so scared,
Some naivety survived inside,
To someday trust someone that cared.
To find someone who wouldn't mind,
To hold me when I'm weak,
To help me leave my fear behind,
And find me what I seek.
I hide in the shadow of emotion,
Convinced that he was never true,
And the one to plant that seed of fear,
My father, that man was you...